hairy mammal monthly

ATTN: FIRST TIME READERS...BEGIN AT THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE AND READ UP...CHRONOLOGY IS IMPORTANT! *author's note on this blog: this is intended to be an anthropological study and is as objective as i can make it...it is not an attempt to ridicule but only to chronicle...i only put myself in the stories because it is absolutely necessary, but try as much as possible to keep my opinions to myself...i have chosen this subject because of his gregariousness and proximity...

Thursday, October 26, 2006

i have not seen the mammal much lately, so most of his hi-jinks are inevitably happening to some other lucky soul...i did see him last night and i tried to provoke...i yelled, "i hate joe lieberman"...to which he burst through the door..."i hate him too," he replied, "but we should be focusing our energies on winnable races...sure it gives a reason for all those liberal bloggers to pat themselves on the back, but it doesn't change policy"...i replied to egg him on, "yeah but i am happy he lost the primary, i am not a democrat and i take pride in petty victories"...he continued, [addressing the liberal bloggers] "to all the liberals i say fuck you! its about policy! its about furthering the democratic policies!"..."but mammal," i say, "i don't care about policies, lieberman was a conservative bastard and i am glad he was embarrassed"...(this continues in the same vein, me provoking him on issues i do not care about, and he yelling 'fuck you!' to liberals (never mentioning me specifically but indirectly meaning me))...when i got tired i stopped arguing and he eventually was moving towards the door..however, on his way out i couldn't resist, i said, "joe lieberman sucks"...to which the mammal came back in and resumed the argument full bore shouting louder and louder to imaginary foes, "fuck you, fuck you!"...this time i did not say anything on his way out, because the mammal will never leave unless he has the last word...he then took a shower singing "louie louie" at the top of his lungs (obviously still not out of his system from the all night louie-fest a week prior) and shouting to the walls, "oh yeah, show us the pussy!" while intermittently doing his version of the 'human beat box'...as he was leaving the apartment he shouts "au revoir" in a french accent, so i shout "adios"...to which he again shouts "au revoir", to which i reply "what?"...and he closes the door still mumbling with the accent "what [in english], no francaise?"...

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